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Sunk

by Unturned

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1.
Swimming 02:56
The cycle starts again and now it all depends on where I am and who is there with me. Why can’t I let it be? And I’ve been feeling weak like the apple tree in my grandmas backyard. It’s all the same to me, treading with glass in my feet. I can taste the blood, the smoke in my lungs. What am I running from? I’ll found out soon enough. Swimming through my thoughts again. The taste of your lips is enough to keep me homesick, so I’ll breathe in your chemicals. Reaping what I sow again, looking through the lens, I could never shake this tunnel vision. So I’ll just bounce and rebound. Why did I let this happen to me? Let my thoughts just strangle me. I just need something tangible when you’re not here. And I hate the sound, the weight that my words carry out. They bring no sustenance. I just wanna be strong enough to be someone you can depend on. Why can’t I just be? Why can’t I let it be okay? Losing confidence in my consciousness. Nothing’s permanent when I’m losing all my friends.
2.
Headrush 02:42
Why even bother trying when my patience is running thinner than my waist line? And I won’t keep denying that I’m not cutting my teeth just to fill this void in my mind. I can’t keep this up, what I’ve built’s just come undone. So I’ll just Write it all over again. Tell myself it’s a means to an end. But it’s useless (I never can) combat my lack of consciousness. I know that I’m better than this but I could care less. I always wanted to outrun my apathy. Hold a stoic contempt for the person I’m supposed to be. Traded my ambition for constant lethargy. Thought I could just save face but I was wrong. Write it all over again. Tell myself it’s a means to an end. But it’s useless (I never can) combat my lack of consciousness. I know that I’m better than this. Am I better than this?
3.
Shake 02:40
When can I just admit that I’ve been hating this? Can’t bridge the distance between sentiment and happiness. Am I self-medicating or am I just having fun? Can’t tell the difference when I hide my thoughts from everyone. Just play it cool. Shake it up you wanted to Slow down. How could I ever speak my mind you were never around? So just slow down. It’s getting hard to breathe when I’ve always got my foot in my mouth. We were the first ones to be dancing at the party. Sunday morning sipping whiskey in our coffee. Now I self-medicate, just tell myself I’m having fun. I’m treading granite but I don’t know what I’m running from. But I know I’m chasing a pipe-dream, something I’ll never be. Constantly overstating fallacies. Why can’t we do this? Why can’t we? Slow down. How could I ever speak my mind you were never around? So just slow down. It’s getting hard to breathe when I’ve always got my foot in my mouth. You were the only one that I could be honest with. We fell asleep on lakeshore drive as the bus drove past Lake Michigan. Wish I remember what you said when you spoke to me in French, we were drinking in your north side dorm room. Was I enough to come home to? Slow down. How could I ever speak my mind you were never around? So just slow down. It’s getting hard to breathe when I’ve always got my foot in my mouth.
4.
Vertigo 03:16
Write it up in a thousand lines, why does all this still feel the same? Maybe I’m to blame. I’ve got broken teeth from chewing through your bones. You’re fine with losing hope. Is this what I wanted? A fractured version of me dwelling in the dreams of the person I know I’ll never be? Spinning in front of me, giving me vertigo. My eyes are red from the substances that made me feel at home. I should pack up and leave but there’s nowhere to go. So I’ll just watch all my friends sail off to the greater unknown. I’m not getting anywhere. Swallow me without a chaser. Spit me out onto the pavement and watch me become one with the concrete on your street. Spinning in front of me, giving me vertigo. My eyes are red from the substances that made me feel at home. I should pack up and leave but there’s nowhere to go. So I’ll just watch all my friends sail off to the greater unknown. I hate watching you go. I hate watching you cross the state line, it fucks with my mind. I know I seem upset all the time, shifting my shape to change pace, ‘cause I hate watching you go. Spinning in front of me, giving me vertigo. You’re the one thing in my life that makes me feel whole. Spinning in front of me, giving me vertigo. My eyes are red from the substances that made me feel at home. I should pack up and leave but there’s nowhere to go. So I’ll just watch all my friends sail off to the greater unknown.
5.
Comedown 03:11
Painting portraits in my head, I’m so devoid of your cadence. Color you in hues of red, the canvas we created when I felt like a tourist in my own skin, going through the same shit everyday. I was growing a garden that would never come to bloom. I can’t shake this self-complacent curse. And you know that I know that you know that I’ve been searching for a way out, did you find out that I’m rotting myself to the core? Looming like the smoke in your bedroom, a permanent crutch used just to guide us through the freezing cold. Exhale and let me go. Never feeling whole when you’re not home. Am I supposed to be alone? Tell myself it’s what I need, I won’t fit into this mold. I’ve had enough of it. I’ve been searching for a way out, did you find out that I’m rotting myself to the core? Looming like the smoke in your bedroom, a permanent crutch used just to guide us through the freezing cold. I traded change for growth.

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released March 22, 2019

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Unturned Minneapolis, Minnesota

Minnesota Rock Band.

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