I don't want your apology, I just want you to be straight with me for once in your in life show some fucking honesty. I'll cave in and dissolve through the cracks on your street. And then I guess I'll go home, 'cause I'm losing patience and nothing's changed, I'm still learning to let go. I'm afraid to plant these roots of stability because I know they won't grow and I'll always be the one to stand in your way. Growth is something I never could ignore, I can't say that I'm moving forward. Your broken bones will mend but I'll never be your friend (Give up and let it go, give up and let it go) Losing sleep, I'm not losing sleep over you. We couldn't work it out, you wouldn't hear me out I can't pretend that I feel the same as I did back then Growth is something I never could ignore, I can't say that I'm moving forward. Your broken bones will mend but I'll never be your friend (Give up and let it go, give up and let it go) I don't wanna change but change is growth and growth is strength.

I'll never amount to anything, I'll be a disappointment, (just like you said), I'm feeling dormant and (fucking useless) My youth is all I have, and I've been growing up way too fast. And I have tried to see things through your eyes I'll learn to pull my weight again. Don't you fucking tell me that you always had my back (courage is what I lack) Try to numb myself and reject my doubts. I'm not making progress.

Is it warm there in Indiana? 'Cause it's cold here and I'm fed up with all the things that I know will never come to change. I'm consequently being drained of every ounce of strength. Now I'm nothing but dust hung up on your shelf, the spitting image of everything you tell yourself you'll never be, stability is something you could never find in me. But that's okay. I can't say that I am ready for this, two years of coping in this ignorance. And I know what you meant that day when you said I should have seen this coming. I'll grow my hair out just for the winter, maybe then I'll feel content with the person I am, the person I want to be. Will I ever be? I can't say that I am ready for this, two years of coping in this ignorance. And I know what you meant that day when you said I should have seen this coming. You lost your spine when you lost your temper. Left me to drown in your doubt and anger.

My hands are broken, calloused, from picking at the fragments and I’ll keep my distance while you remain constant to me. My shoulders can only bear what my spine can hold (and your mistakes will always be worth your weight in gold) I won't carry you. Why did you have to go and make me feel so cynical when I needed space to grow? You never had the guts to call and I can't match your pace, so you can chalk it up to me not being good enough for anyone. Tighten your grip so I can't breathe, suffocate this honesty. I've waited so long for you to see that I've moved past my doubt and grief. And I've been filling this empty headspace with the memories that I drank like poison. Why couldn’t you just tell me that you needed more from me? I'll keep moving forward and I'll shake my blunt discomfort. Why did you have to go and make me feel so cynical when I needed space to grow? You never had the guts to call and I can't match your pace, so you can chalk it up to me not being good enough for anyone. Just be real with me, go home and then you'll see how you cursed my aching head with every word you ever said. I'll hold my regrets and escape from feeling stagnant. Why did you have to go and make me feel so cynical when I needed space to grow? You never had the guts to call and I can't match your pace, so you can chalk it up to me not being good enough for anyone. Why did you have to go? Why did you have to go? Why did you have to go and make me feel so cynical?

These words are punching holes through my teeth, breaking my jaw and making my gums bleed. I never had the right things to say But it never mattered anyway Because it's fate that I changed and you left, you set your sights to grow in the south Midwest. I'll over step my boundary and finally outgrow all my fears And I have learned to keep my distance. Indiana changed everything but things are better now I've lost my sense of disdain. And you always said that I'll be in your head, Feel real in my own skin, I finally feel content. With who I've become and all the things you've done, I'm just another pawn in all of the things you love. I can't say that I feel blue just like your hair, how could you call me out and say I never cared? It's a test of patience in learning how to face this I know I'm selfish, at least I'm honest.

Bleed my thoughts into this stack of paper, try to rid myself of my regressive anger. I can not combat this lack of courage, this lack of effort. I'll move on and I'll shed my deadweight, do everything I can just to set my mind straight. Learn to mend all of these broken pieces, I shot myself in the kneecaps for no good reason. As much as I'd like to, I can't uproot you. Dig through the soil of my mind to find you. And it's cutting straight through my bones. Tread the lands in my head for miles. Self-medicate my weakened state just to stand up. Self-medicate my weakened state, I feel like a burden on everyone. As much as I'd like to, I can't uproot you. Dig through the soil of my mind to find you. And it's cutting straight through my bones. Tread the lands in my head for miles. I found my strength when I went let go, I found my strength when I went home. I found my strength when I let go, I found my strength so I'll go home.